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Defeated by the Master of Adorability. You may have won this time but this isn't the last you've seen of me.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009 9 comments

O.M.Gosh. I think Martha is starting to rub off on Thing5.





She just pitched a complete footstompingarmsgoingup&downamileaminutescreamingatthetopofherlungs hissy fit.
Because it was BedTime! and I wouldn't let her put her book in the right pile on her shelf and organize all of the other books that were laying on the floor.

What have I done to my child???

And then she totally suckered me into letting her stay up for a few more minutes engaged me in an absolutely fascinating and irresistible conversation.

Thing5 "Will you pleeeeesssssase lay with me for a few minutes?

*Me "You're a Big.Girl. Don't you want to go lay down in your bed like a Big.Girl?

Thing5 "No cause I don't wanna be all alone."

*Me "But you're never all alone cause Jesus is always with you in your spirit."

Thing5 "But no he's not there right now."

*Me "I promise he's always there. No matter what."

Thing5 "Well I think he went down to my stomach for a little while."

And then proceeded to say...

"Jesus is the Best.Ever! And so is God! and I think he has sharp claws. Sharp claws that give you claw kisses. Oooh sharp claw teeth that give you claw teeth kisses. Like sharks. But not like the real sharks that eat you but like the nice sharks who talk and they don't eat you cause they like Sharkboy and Lavagirl."

*Me "Hmmm.... I'm just not sure about all that."

And then because I am a.complete.sucker my SuperMommyStayingPowers were weakened by such blatant adorability, I admitted defeat and when we were all snugglied together she looked up at me and whispered very softly "I love you mommy soooooooo much!"

Because a (notSO) SuperMommy knows it's easier to pick your battles.

And some battles are just worth losing ;)






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Umm...ya. Sorry. I've really just got nothing here....

Monday, July 27, 2009 8 comments

Random

Something unexpected and irrelevant, but often amusing. A very over-used word now, please people, use it when something really is random. See example below for a true example of random.

Holly: Sorry to hear your hamster died Bob...

Bob: Window cleaners for British rail should watch out for flying man-eating deckchairs today, swimming in from the south along with the flea-ridden coathangers. The calf needs the blinds shut due to his purple parrot problem, and the pet washing line needs a slap round the face for dropping the flying monkey on the "queen of the night" tulips. The muffin man is responsible for the sudden outburst of rain yesterday as he forgot to pay the rent on his blue strawberries. I'm sorry, did you say you wanted a biscuit?

Holly: Random! Custard cream please.

  • I just can't stop thinking about this baby. Stellan's story is... beautiful and ... heart wrenching and ...
  • It made me cry more than the end of Prince Caspian.
  • I was boohoo'in just watching that clip.
  • I know. But it's sad!
  • That movie absolutely rocks.
  • Just so you know... the girls and I totally karoakied that song when I was looking up that link.
  • Aaaaand... we rocked!
  • We're thinking of putting that up on You Tube.
  • Hahahahaha.
  • There is a reason that I sing in the car.
  • So Stellan's story reminded me of this one time...
  • Okay. I cannot think the phrase "this one time" without immediately ending it with *at band camp.
  • Idk why.
  • As I was saying, reading the posts about Stellan took my mind back to when I was pregnant with Thing3.
  • I was on COMPLETE bed rest for the.entire.pregnancy.
  • She was born at 27 weeks and spent about 2 months in the NICU.
  • That was... excruciating. To say the least.
  • I seriously thought I was going to die from *the Mommy Guilt.
  • That's a real thing. Ask any mom.
  • You feel guilty for leaving the ones at home to be at the hospital.
  • You feel guilty for leaving the one at the hospital to be at home.
  • You feel guilty cause you're SO tired from running back and forth that all you really want to do is take a loooong nap and just kinda... wakeupwhenit'sallover.
  • And you feel completely useless because really... there is nothing you can do to change it.
  • Until you remember that you can get on your knees.
  • In prayer people! Bring it up from the gutter ;)
  • Thing3 is 7 years old now.
  • And perfect!
    She is the physical essence of my faith.
  • And the hope that other people need to cling to.


Photobucket

Isn't she so prettyful?!

  • I am so rockin Alanis right.now.
  • I thought you might like to know that.
  • Aaaaand I am just all outta random for today...

But Keely's the queen of random.
I bet she never runs out
The Un Mom

Oh ya! Almost forgot.

I'm gonna get a bff.
I'm not really up on that whole thing anymore so...
Is there like a store or something that you can get one of those at?
Hit me up if you have one you don't need any more. K?

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So stop what you're doing and get up RIGHT NOW and go hug your kids!

Saturday, July 18, 2009 8 comments

Unless your kids are asleep and you reinforce the *He Who Wakes The Baby Gets The Baby Back To Sleep* rule like we do.

In that case, just go stand in the doorway and give them a very quiet *Air Hug.

Cause I'm surely not getting any more babies back to sleep tonight.

I am dooonnneee! The SuperMommy cape ...aka Thing4's blankie... is hung up for the day.

PleaseGodLetThemAllStayAsleepNowThatI'veOpenedMyBigMouth!

Guess what's coming up ya'll???



I LOVE their disclaimer.
Note: As we all know, plans can change, but this is what we expect.

Truth in advertising.

I'm totally using that from now on so....
if you know me, you can just expect to hear that from me in the future when we make plans ;)

I'm sorry I suck like that but ily anyway.

I personally think that you should hug your kids everyday but hey... who am I to argue with a National Holiday?

I can see it now...

"Nope. Sorry. I already hugged you this year. You have 258 more days to go before your next hug."

I'm sure that would go over well.

So, here are 6 reasons to Hug Your Kids ... everyday :)


1. Because they cheerfully and gracefully suck up any punishment that you dish out...
Thing1 "But Daaaaaad. I've been mommyblogged! Since when is public humiliation considered an effective form of discipline?"






2. Because they know how to cover their bases...
Thing 2 "And Dear Lord please forgive us for all of the things we did and said that were not good today, and please forgive us for all of the bad things that we are about to do."



3. Because they have such an extraordinary sense of smell...
Thing3 "This flower smells like...like....ummmm..." long, thoughtful pause ...
Mommy "...a flower?"
Thing3 "Nooooo." ...deep sniff of aforementioned flower ... It smells like A Beautiful Day!"



4. Because if you can't do it, they will...
Thing4 "It's okay Ma... don't be a scaredy cat... I got this"



5. Because they are unwavering in thier convictions....
Thing5 "Well. You're not the boss of meeee."
Mommy "Yes I most certainly am the boss of You. I am The Mommy! The Mommy is always the boss.
Thing5 "Well. You aaarrreee the boss of meeee."



6. Because they are just SO gosh darn huggable!



Now, that just makes me wanna go and find some slobbery baby kisses. Because those are my favorite ;)

So... go hug Your kids!

And have A Beautiful Day.

And if you're very very lucky ... maybe You can find some slobbery baby kisses too ;)



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The one where God surely does have an ironic sense of humor...

Friday, July 17, 2009 4 comments

One thing I have always always known, regardless of anything else, is that I wanted to be a wife and a mom. No matter what else I did ...that was a *given.

I remember praying for this as far back as I can remember. And my only *request, was that the man I fell in love with would have a passion for me that was so intense it would only be superseded by his passion for Christ.

Had I known then what I know now I would *most definently have thrown in a few more particulars about dishes and diapers ;)

Of course I was really only expecting to have 1... maybe 2 kids.

Hahahaha.


SO... my Alohaa Friday questions for YOU are...

  1. Is there anything you've always just KNOWN about your life?
  2. Does it look the way you expected it to?


Now, head on over to An Island Life to link up and answer some other, more interesting Aloha Friday questions.

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Come Out Come Out Wherever You Are.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009 9 comments

Pssst......
Hey you.

Mr. Sunshine.





How ya been? Haven't really seen you much lately.

I know you're pretty busy. You know, giving light to the world and all.

Lately I've been pretty darn busy too. Even busier than usual.

Because I have 6 children, SIX children at home all.day.long. and since they can't go outside they've been more than a little creative about occupying themselves.

INSIDE.my.house!

There have been frogs and skateboard ramps and water fights with the sprayer thingie on my kitchen sink. And end.less. hours of Hannah Montana.

So look, since we're both so busy here lets just be real and make this quick so we can get back to what we have to do.

I 'm totally onto you.

I've heard, from a very reputable source that you've been ALL OVER South Tampa like a crackhead on.... well, crack.

Ya. South Tampa is nice. I grew up there. I like it too.

Hyde Park & Ballast Point rock. I know.

But YOU cannot play favorites. It is your JOB to shine on everyone.

I demand my sunshiny day rights!

So go out there and ...shine.

Well. Maybe ...not so much right now.

Cause it's like midnight here and some people just might not like that so much.



I bet She has sunshine.


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Random Linky Bloghoppin Stuff. On A Tuesday.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009 8 comments

All of my favorite things in 1 post!

Lists, Multi-tasking and Efficiency.

Woohoo!


We're takin a walk on the *wild side;)

I know.

Martha, Martha, Martha!

She pops up so much lately I'm beginning to think she's a whole 'nother personality.

Would that make me schizophrenic or is that only if I start talking to her???

IDK.

So here are some random things about me that you might not know and probably didn't want to but have always wanted to.
  1. I hate small talk. Even if you call it "fellowship" and serve doughnuts.
  2. I'm shy. Really. Just pass the doughnuts, and please don't make me talk.
  3. Unless I know you. Then you probably won't be able to shut me up. Because chances are you're the FIRST adult conversation I've had all week.
  4. So I guess you get that I'm not big on social settings.
  5. or public restrooms.
  6. or other things that smell bad.
  7. I really really love Febreeze.
  8. and Shout.
  9. I can use an ENTIRE bottle of Shout in 3 days.
  10. I really really do not love laundry.
  11. It is possible to feed kids all.day.long and then look up at 4pm and realize you forgot to eat. Again.
  12. And then you're so hungry you could eat ... well ... something you normally wouldn't.
  13. I keeping a running estimate of the caloric values of everything I eat in mind.
  14. If we are what we eat, I am 1/3 veggies, 1/3 carbs, and 1/3 Chocolate Chip Cookies.
  15. If you’re anal retentive ocd enough to calculate calories and then admit to extreme cookie consumption, you probably should not make such information public.
  16. I write inspirational, * chick lit.
  17. Would love to be published one day.
  18. But would hate all the social scenes that might involve.
  19. Stormie O’Martian’s The Power of a Praying Wife was Life.Changing.
  20. My husband and I have been together for 10 years.
  21. We were very young.
  22. And very, very stupid.
  23. And God has done SO much with us that now I would only add 1 notveryemphatic very before the stupid.
  24. And that's saying ALOT.
  25. God is really really good.
  26. I like to talk to Him when I'm half asleep snuggled under the covers.
  27. And when I'm driving.
  28. Which often makes the people driving beside me look at me like I'm insane for talking to myself.
  29. 30% of those times I might...actually... be talking to myself.
  30. I have to go Google Bing Right.Now. because I saw an ad while I was checking my email and Martha says I must find out what it is immediately!
Ya'll have a great day!


randomtuesday



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Thing1 is SOOOO grounded

Monday, July 13, 2009 12 comments

He doesn't know it yet. Right now he's passed out drooling on his pillow like a sailor on leave at the end of a 3day drinking binge.

My firstborn. My most intelligent, most responsible child

was on Facebook at 3am.

How do I know this? Because when I logged in at 7:53 this morning I got this notification...




Tristan challenged you to a quiz. View quiz >> 5 hours ago.

Didn't really think that one all the way through didja?

The next time you ttyl will be about the time Thing6 starts preschool.

So my darling Thing1. I'm happy to see that you're so *itk on short text words.

Maybe you can figure this one out.

G4L!

Now, I'm off to try and figure out how to lock this baby up. Or down. Or .. idk cause I've never had to do it before. But just know this. Compared to getting into this computer .. getting into Fort Knox will be like takin candy from a baby.

Actually that's really not so easy.

Have you ever tried it? Babies are very ...grabby.

I'm gonna try again.

Compared to getting into this computer .. getting into Fort Knox will seem like a piece of cake.

Yummy chocolate cake.



Now I want cake.

So I'm off to put the cuffs on Thing1.

Well... maybe I'll just go find some cake first ;)


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Open Letter to .. my Wild Child

Thursday, July 9, 2009 11 comments

Dear Thing4,


I love you. I love you sooooo much. I really really do.

Butt seriouslyyy... you make me completely insane sometimes.

I say "NO THING4 DON"T JUMP THOSE STEPS ON THAT SKATEBOARD. It's a CONCRETE FLOOR for goodness sake! You'll BUST YOUR HEAD OPEN." And you look at me, and listen to all of my reasons why you should.not.do.that. And then you consider ... aaaand ... "Nah. Don't worry Mom. That won't happen to me. I know how to do this."

And when I think I finally have you convinced not to pretend your Tony Hawk inside my house, and I turn around to chase after Thing6 who has learned how to take off his diaper and RUUUUUNNN while laughing hysterically because he is winning, I hear your delighted shout of glee "I KNEW I could do it. Right On."

I mean, really. WTHeck am I supposed to do with you?

ALL of my threats of "because you could hurt yourself" are just tossed right out the window that Thing5 has opened and is now trying to climb out of.

And when I feebly say "Ya. Well. You COULD have gotten hurt" you just grin at me and sing "So what who cares?? I got Jesus baby." (No more Lecrae for YOU!)

Aaaand apparently, you do. Because if you didn't your head would most likely have been split in two long long ago.

If I know nothing else, I so know ONE thing.

With you as my son I will NEVER. ever. ever. forget that I need Him too.

Because I surely do suck at being your mom all by myself.


Oh Ya! YOU too can join JenniJiggity every week for Open Letter Thursday.

All you have to do is Write an Open Letter on your blog, and include a link to Jiggety Jigg (you can grab my button)!

Then go to her site, sign the Mr. Linky Widget, and visit the other bloggers who are playing along!

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Not Because I Could Hear You....

Monday, July 6, 2009 11 comments




Okay. So, Thing4 was doing something he wasn't supposed to be doing.

Because that is what he does best.

He was behind me and he thought I was distracted playing with Thing6.

*All knowing Mommy "Elijah! Stop it right now!!!

*Shocked Thing4 "But how did you know..??? "

Deep thoughtful silence ....

"OHHHH ... you saw me with your back eyes didn't you???"

Yes. Yes I did.


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The Mommy Confessions ... but God said yes!

Friday, July 3, 2009 8 comments

It's Friday once again.
Time for another round of...


Mommy Confessionsss

dun du dun dunnn....


Not only is Thing1 smarter than me, but he's also a better person.

Yesterday he called me on not being nice.

Of course, the conversation I was having was with theBiggestThingofThemAll and we were OUTSIDE the back door almost whispering so the ONLY way Thing1 could have heard was with his EAR to the DOOR and really ... you can't complain too much about hearing something you don't want to hear when you are EAVESDROPPING...

But what I said wasn't nice.

At all.

And Thing1 did hear.

*Hanging head in shame*

While I was feeling guilty for that I decided I might as well feel guilty for not being so nice earlier too so...

Woman of questionable morality ... I shouldn't have...questioned your morality.

Even if you do make it way.too.easy by twittering pics of yourself with no pants on.

Maybe you just can't help yourself.


While I'm confessing, I should probably also mention my ineffective discipline techniques.

Yesterday Thing4 got in trouble for having something that he wasn't supposed to have, and I said "But you didn't even ask..."

He replied "Ya. I asked God. And He said yes!"

Dead serious. With a totally straight face.

Aaaand I just walked away laughing.




The Mommy Confessions is a weekly series by Life Starring the Kids & Me.

As moms, many of us have things that we would like to get off our chests or that we would just like to confess. So here is the place to do it!

Once you read here, pop over to her page and link up with Mr. Linky (if he's in the mood).

Join in and spill it....

What's YOUR Mommy Confession?
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