• Yesterday was the.day.from.HELL.
• I am POSITIVE that somehow, at some time ... atleast once during the day I absolutely earned the Worst.Mother.EVER! award.
• Not exactly what I was aiming for.
• I'm totally going to blame theBiggestThingOfThemAll. Cause it all started with this conversation the night before....

Me: "Okay. But I was going to say that I want to clean..."

theBiggestThingofThemAll: "Clean everything so I can *blah blah blah"

• SO what's the best way to get something CLEAN????
• Move EVERYTHING out of your way!
• Aaaaand while you've already got everything torn apart ya might as well just rearrange the Entire room.
• And if you're switching that room, why not just do 2 or 3 or 4 more????
• While I was busy doing that... the Things were busy doing All.Kinds.Of.Stuff.
• Thing1 put a hole in his thumb.
• Thing2 hit Thing 3 in the mouth with a hammer.
• A hammer!!!
• She was trying to *fix her chair and apparently Thing3 thought it would be a good idea to stand BEHIND her.
• While she swung.a.hammer.
• You can imagine all the bloodshed for yourself.
• ALSO .. apparently... everything I say to Thing2 is considered (by her) to be *optional suggestions as opposed to the adamantinstructionthatyouMUSTobey that I consider it to be.
• I really wanted to hit her.
• I didn't.
• I wouldn't.
• I've never hit anyone in my entire life and I'm certainly NOT going to start with an 8yo.
• But I really really wanted to.
• What kind of mother wants to hit their kid????
• It is IMPOSSIBLE to walk away when you are a sahm of 6.
• Okay, I'm exaggerating a little bit.
• It's not impossible to walk away... but it is completely impossible to walk away ALONE!
• Thing6 aka *theDiaperAnnihilator found the way out of his diaper.
• It had some stuff in it.
• He decided to plaaaaaay with it. He decorated. All.over.his.crib.
• While I'm giving him a bath Thing5 comes in to *potty.
• For some strange reason she has to take off every article of clothing she has on to do this.
• She does what she has to do and instead of immediately regarbing she takes off running...
• Out the door....
• So if you happened to be driving in Tampa yesterday and you saw a soaking wet crazy woman carrying a half naked baby in a towel chasing a totally naked 3 yo around the yard....
• Ya.
• That would have been me.
• That's not even half of what went on... but I'm getting Emotionally.Exhausted. just thinking about it.
• On another note...
• I am SO getting a Toy Fairy.
• When theBiggestThingofThemAll brings something home and says "Look baby I brought you something" what he really means is " Look now ...soIcangetmybrowniepoints ...cause it's *suppos'ta be yours but I'm going to take it and there is a very high probability that you will never ever see it again. "
• Or something very very close to that anyway.
• We had to put a PadLock on the fridge.
• You think I'm joking.... but I am SO serious.
• Access Denied!
• Aaaaand... guess who still has to put aaalllllllll that laundry away???

I'm gonna go get on that. And you, well, you can go get your random on.

Keely's Random is *SuperFly.

O.M.Gosh. I think Martha is starting to rub off on Thing5.

Unless your kids are asleep and you reinforce the *He Who Wakes The Baby Gets The Baby Back To Sleep* rule like we do.

In that case, just go stand in the doorway and give them a very quiet *Air Hug.

Cause I'm surely not getting any more babies back to sleep tonight.

I am dooonnneee! The SuperMommy cape ...aka Thing4's blankie... is hung up for the day.

PleaseGodLetThemAllStayAsleepNowThatI'veOpenedMyBigMouth!

Guess what's coming up ya'll???

2. Because they know how to cover their bases...
Thing 2 "And Dear Lord please forgive us for all of the things we did and said that were not good today, and please forgive us for all of the bad things that we are about to do."

3. Because they have such an extraordinary sense of smell...
Thing3 "This flower smells like...like....ummmm..." long, thoughtful pause ...
Mommy "...a flower?"
Thing3 "Nooooo." ...deep sniff of aforementioned flower ... It smells like A Beautiful Day!"

4. Because if you can't do it, they will...
Thing4 "It's okay Ma... don't be a scaredy cat... I got this"

5. Because they are unwavering in thier convictions....
Thing5 "Well. You're not the boss of meeee."
Mommy "Yes I most certainly am the boss of You. I am The Mommy! The Mommy is always the boss.
Thing5 "Well. You aaarrreee the boss of meeee."

6. Because they are just SO gosh darn huggable!

Now, that just makes me wanna go and find some slobbery baby kisses. Because those are my favorite ;)

So... go hug Your kids!

And have A Beautiful Day.

And if you're very very lucky ... maybe You can find some slobbery baby kisses too ;)

So how was ya'lls day today?

Mine was good. I've been organizing;)

Today has been ~& still is~ one of those days where my brain just decides to do it's own thing. Without consulting me. It just goes fluttering around. From here to there. Picking random things up and cluttering my head with them.

And then all of those random things keep jumbling around until I declutter them. (I know. I love her too! I'm too...er.... OCD about cleaning to use her system but.... I really love all of her lists!!!!)

Hmmm..I really need to find some type of recovery program for this list thing.

I wonder if I can 27 fling thing (however you say it) my brain. Maybe not so much the 27 thing part. But definently the fling part. I can just picture myself standing there flinging things out of my brain.

But I'm not cleanin up the mess!

Speaking of *things. Thing5 was laughing about something (she's very random too) and she looked at me and says "Mommy you cracker me up!" And now everytime I think about something funny I hear her saying that and it crackers me up too.


Oh and speaking of randomness, what do ya'll think about facebook? Do you use it? I never really got into the whole MySpace thing, but I really like Facebook. I have to check several things online throughout the day and facebook just fits right in there. It takes like 5 seconds to see whats going on. I like that. It's efficient. And I tend to roll...efficiently :)



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Today I have

1. Washed, dried, folded & fluffed (ha ha ha do you really believe that?) about 200 loads of laundry. Really. That's not an exaggeration.
2. Wondered how such relatively CLEAN children can make thier clothes SMELL so BAD.
3. Changed roughly 30 (million) dirty diapers.
4. Wondered WHY they have to be SO much like thier daddy in *that respect. Maybe HE should be the official diaper changer.
5. Listened to Thing 1 describe ~in detail~ his latest story creation. Life in Snotland. Complete with illustrations. And maps. "Daddy lives on booger lane, where do you want to live?" As far away from there as possible.
6. Wondered if there is a way to somehow count this little project as 'school'.
7. Kissed thousands of boo boo's. Real & imagined.
8. Yet, when Thing 4 smacked his head (hard enough for me to HEAR the Whomp) and I asked him if he wanted mommy to kiss it he just said "No it's good ma" and continued on with his little 2 yr old life.,
9. Wondered when my love for my children overcame my complete disgust for all feets.
10. Watched Thing 5 make faces in the mirror.
11. Wondered how long the "playin with the pretty baby in the mirror" game would actually be entertaining.
12. 47 minutes. Yes the child looked at herself in the mirror for forty seven minutes.
13. Aaaand we watched her the entire time.
14. Yes we have no life.
15. We started out with nothing.
16. And we still have a little left.
17. Listened to Thing 1 tell the very vivid (& unfortunately true) story of how he and the biggest Thing of them all caught a dead cat while fishing the day before.
18. Apparently it was SO cool.
19. But only because it was already dead.
20. Wondered if the entourage of pets that have lived & died during thier time with our children, has emotionally scarred & completely desensitized my child.
21. Was actually thankful to find out that he cried when they caught it.
22. Felt bad for being happy about a crying child. Still a little happy to know we can skip the years of therapy.
23. Would have skipped the therapy anyway. We have daily therapy sessions on our knees.
24. Wiped snotty noses 400 times.
25. Once with my shirt.
26. Wondered if the snotland story was based on actual facts.
27. Decided to change my layout AGAIN.
28. Wondered if I really *do have multiple personalities.
29. Started to write a post about the layout changes.
30. Wondered why I was trying to rationalize blog background decisions to an inanimate object.
31. Skipped the post and ate some chocolate instead.

*** Edited ~ Thing 1 has brought it to my attention, that the reference to booger lane was incorrect. It is actually booger pit road. And his dad not only resides there, he is the king of snotville ... er snotland. Thing 1 has very *graciously forgiven me for this error. According to him I am not expected to really understand such complex ideas. Thank God for that. I was having quite a hard time wrapping my tiny little brain around such a big thought. ROFL