• Yesterday was the.day.from.HELL.
• I am POSITIVE that somehow, at some time ... atleast once during the day I absolutely earned the Worst.Mother.EVER! award.
• Not exactly what I was aiming for.
• I'm totally going to blame theBiggestThingOfThemAll. Cause it all started with this conversation the night before....

Me: "Tomorrow I'm going to try to ..."

theBiggestThingofThemAll: "Put aaaalllllll that laundry away????"

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O.M.Gosh. I think Martha is starting to rub off on Thing5.

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It's Friday once again.
Time for another round of...

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And that means it's time for...

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Since I like it so much, and because I was SO good at it last time, It is once again time for...............

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So, I had a pretty good day today. You?

I've been having a great big AHA moment.

Those are always good ;)

It's like there were all of these things just dumped out on the floor of my mind ... just there.... kinda like a bunch of Legos that have been knocked over and abandoned ... probably by Thing6... for a brighter, shinier new toy.

All of a sudden they've become this intricate thing like... well...like the things you can build with Legos if you can read the instructions. Which I can...not do apparently.

I know. Just follow the directions! It's not rocket science.

Thing 1 can.

Aaaand I'm feelin smarter and smarter all the time.

There should be a list of what to REALLY expect when you're expecting.

#1 Atleast 1 of your children will be smarter than you. And know it.

but you can blame that on ...

#2 Losing brain cells is a part of labor.
One minute they're there and the next...they're just gone.

Fooorrreeevvveeerrr.

In my mind this is said in the voice of the little kid from The Sandlot.

Ever seen that movie? Oh come on you're killin me Smalls!

I would look up a clip for you but I know how much you like to research things for yourself.

Ok I have absolutely nowhere to go after that so...

I DENIED Thing4 the mommykisswhichmakeseverything,everythingbetter today.

Ya. Mean mommy.

He was playing outside and got hurt and came in to get some *feel better so I hugged him and asked him what happened.

He looked at me in all teary eyed seriousness and said "Mommy can you kiss my butt cause I hurt it when I fell off my skateboard."

#3 Always Always Always ask where it hurts before you offer to kiss it.


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SO, I was bloggy jumping around earlier. I know. There were probably 8 trillion other *things I could have been doing that would have been waaaay more productive.

But I wasn't doing them. I was doing that instead.

While I was doing that I found

TADA...that was my 1st confession.

I wasted an hour and a half today bloggy jumping when I could have been doing more productive things like scrubbing the bathroom floor. Again. Because somehow, even though it gets cleaned every morning, by the end of the day, I feel like I've stumbled into a citgo gas station bathroom.

Which leads me to another confession. I don't really clean the bathroom every morning. I clean it every time I go in there. But I didn't want you to know how anal retentive...er...ocd I am so I wasn't going to tell you that.

But really, I have to be.

There would be no other way to maintain my sanity if I wasn't.

There are (atleast) 6 sets of dirty kid shoes (which can get very dirty by the way) trampling all over it all day, boys who somehow *forget to lift the lid (which is not for lack of being reminded I might add), toddlers who like to make *tissue snow (read: tear up the toilet paper into teeeeeny tiiiny bits and throw them up into the air so they will fall all over the floor, which, by this time, probably has water all over it (because no matter how much clean water the dog has in a bowl the kitchen she prefers to drink out of the *bowl in the bathroom), the mirror has a filmy layer over 1/2 of it because certain little girls decide *leave messages in lipgloss and then try to wipe it off (so mommy doesn't see) ~with toilet paper~ so now the toilet paper is stuck to the floor AND the mirror, not to mention the footprints ON the toilet seat because for some unknown reason atleast half of my children squat ON TOP OF IT to poop.

I don't know why.

I swear I did NOT potty train them in the back yard.

So, if you ever come to my house and have to use the bathroom, please be aware that I try to pick up the bathroom every hour or so, but it only takes 20 minutes for all of that to happen so.....enter at your own risk.

And guess what???

There was another confession.

I'm pretty good at this ;)

Right on!

Ok, while I'm at it I might as well admit......

I know almost every theme song on the disney channel. Including Hannah Montana. Which has got to be some kind of sick. I even caught myself thinking that Billy Ray Cyrus is pretty yummy now, which is odd because his achy breaky heart never did anything for me before. So now I'm wondering, is he really yummier now or does bad taste come with getting old????

I totally ball at the end of Prince Caspian when they have to leave Narnia EVERY single time I watch it.

I am a terrible *what I want to be when I grow up role model* because earlier today, when Thing1 asked Thing5 she wanted to be when she grew up she answered "A big scary monster".
To which Thing2 added "Well mommy you always say anything's possible."
Well...that's not quite what I had in mind when I said that.


Aaaaand the worst confession of all.......

I am a secret~closet Twilight fan.

I've read all of the books.

Okay. Twice.

And seen the movie.

Um....several times.

And I am forcing Someonee to take me to see New Moon AS SOON AS it comes out.

Which, I just happen to know is Nov. 20th.

I think I'm all confessed out.

For now.

Do YOU have a mommy confession???
Link up over at Life starring the Kids and Me and let us know. Read the full story

Have you ever seen Curious George? Or read the books? About the little monkey who gets into ALL KINDS of trouble? It comes on PBS. Thing 5 LOVES Curious George.

Once I joked to theBiggestThingofThemAll that maybe the kids shouldn't watch it because it might give them ideas. I mean, really, you should see the things this cute little monkey manages to get into.

But it was just a joke.

Now, I'm seriously thinkin of adding Curious George to the ever-growing list of *Things we just don't watch* including but not limited to Sponge Bob which, after watching my children spent the whole day *bleeping half of their sentences, and mooning each other. Thankfully no one else was around to witness that little bit of amusingness. (It is a word. Really!)

Yesterday, Thing4 pulled a totally Curious-George-worthy stunt that had me thisclosetoblowinganartery.

TheBiggestThingofThemAll was leaving (not 4 ever, he was coming back :) So I do a head count as he is leaving, clean up Thing6 from lunch and put him down for a nap (took all of 5 minutes) Apparently theBiggestThingofThemAll had to get some stuff from the garage to put in the truck so he didn't leave right away.

A few nimutes later he leaves, Thing6 is down for a nap and I do another headcount and Thing4 is NOWHERE to be found. Okay. Panic, just a little bit. Call theBiggestThingofThemAll. Keep looking. Check all of the hiding spots. No Thing4. Panic, a little bit more. But Thing4 is really really good at hiding. Never gets caught in hide and seek. Call theBiggestThingofThemAll again. Keep looking. Check outside. No Thing4. Ask random neighborhood teenager. Nooooo Thing4. Then Thing 3 says, "Maybe he ran away because he's tired of going in timeout today." Hmmmm.....alot more panic now. Like completely freaking out kind of panic.

Finally theBiggestThingofThemAll calls to let me know that he found Thing4. In the back of the truck. "Did I surprise ya dad?" Ummm ya. Definently surprised. Especially considering that this child, who, on any other day, CANNOT keep still for 30 seconds, managed to keep still and quiet for a whole 30 minutes until his dad stopped the truck and opened the back door *found the surprise.

His response after I grabbed him and told him (through hysterical tears of course) that "I-was-so-worried-I looked-everywhere-and-couldn't-find-you-don't-EVER-do-that-again!

"Did ya look on the roof?"

I just know that somehow this little episode puts me in the running for worst-mother-EVER.

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I put the kids in school last year.

I know.

Don't bad mommy me.

It was a VERY hard decision to make.

I was writing my own curriculum for 3 schoolagers.

In 3 different grades.

And a preschooler.

I was pregnant.

And very TiReD.

I was chasing a very active toddler

And an extremely hyper preschooler.

There was SO much going on at the time ~ you have NO idea what we went through the past 14 months ~ and

I. Just. Couldn't. Do. It.

I admit it.

I am not *Supermom.

So I prayed and I prayed because I couldn't just hand my little *things over to the Fla public schools.

That would have been the equivalent of throwing them into the *Lions Den.

And yes, I know Daniel made it out just fine....

but it's not like his mom is the one who tossed him in there!

So I was led to a charter school. Actually a Montessori Academy which fit them perfectly coming from a fairly laid back and self directed homeschooling enviroment.

It' technically a public school, BUT because it's a charter school it's run like a private school.

Which we could NEVER afford with 6 kiddos.

There are only 16 (or less) kids in each class.

And,

imagine my shock (and joy) when I found out they actually PRAY *in school.

Yes they do.

But I still felt really really guilty.

Like maybe,

just maybe,

I had failed.

My children.

And my God.

And that I was definently not the *good mommy that I thought I was.

And that I try SO hard to be.

Then I read this book, about the life of Paul.

How EVERY detail of his life

(his birthright, his citizenship, his parents sending him to study under Gamaliel)

was specifically planned the way it was for him to fulfill his purpose.

And I realized that it was OK if *I wasn't the one who taught my children math. Or science. Or geography.

Because *I am still teaching them the most important things of all.

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Would you think me a horrible mother if I told you that the REAL reason I cover my face when my children are saying thier prayers is because I don't want them to see me laughing? This one child in particular cracks me up. I know, it's just plain wrong. You're going to laugh too. Then we'll both be wrong.


Thing 2(6yog): "And Dear Lord please forgive us for all of the things we did and said that were not good today, and please forgive us for all of the bad things that we are about to do."
(Does this mean she's planning in advance?)

Thing 2 " Please God make me beautiful in You because I so LOVE being pretty."

Thing 2 "Jesus please bless my aunt Tina and help her not to be sad and help her to find a new racecar boyfriend who makes her happy. And please give her lots of princess dresses, *and me too, because pretty dresses make everyone SO happy. Especially meee."
(But not so much her Aunt Tina ~ who would rather take 6 kids under 10 to chuckee cheese by herself than wear a 'pretty princess dress. Have you ever tried to do that? Definently NOT something I would recommend. Ever. As in..to infinity and beyond NEVER. Just so you know how strongly I feel about this issue. Did I mention the word never yet? Okay, had to make sure.)

My sister doesn't have a 'racecar' boyfriend. In case the suspense is killing you. He drives an RX7. I think. I can't really remember. I know that it's yellow. ish. Or maybe gold. Although.. he does resemble Jeff Gordon. But he's good people so we try to overlook that. He is NOT a Gordon fan. That helps. SHE is. I guess that helps too. Well, it helps him anyway.

I think it's awesome that my children are just themselves before God. No pretenses. Just what's in thier true heart. The honesty in it just makes it that much sweeter. But I bet He's laughin too:) Read the full story

I think I've become 'that mom'. No, not that mom, the other one. You know, the mom whose mind has completely evaporated to the point that she can't remember her child's name until she gets to it as she goes down the list. I've caught myself doing that SO many times lately.

One of my~little~blessings in disguise, will do something they aren't supposed to do (did I mention that they're not perfect either?) and I will start to call 'em on it, and then I caaaalllll the wrong name. That's when the list starts. And by the time I get it right, I am either (a.) feeling SO guilty (& more stupid than I care to admit) for not knowing my own child's name that I can't bring myself to continue or (b.) walking out of the room looking stern but really trying not to totally lose it because they cannot contain the amusement that they get from watching mommy act insane. It's a very effective discipline method, if you haven't guessed. 

I think I've come up with a solution....

....I am going to give them all the same name. That way, I can never get it wrong. And more importantly, I will look sane.

I know how important it is for children to have thier own individual identities. So, I'll give them different middle names. 

On second thought, maybe I will call them out by name. Thing 1 and Thing 2, Thing 3 and Thing 4, Thing 5 and 
Thing 6... :
D Read the full story

I have a confession to make. To walk in my house, you would think that I'm a pretty clean and organized mom. That's because I'm a FIRM BELIEVER in surface cleaning (shhh don't tell my mother!) If the bathrooms are clean, the counters and tabletops are clear and the floor is picked up, it's clean enough for me! I threw my perfectionism out the window about 4 sets of dirty hands and feet ago. And I can live happily with that.

But the laundry...the BANE of my very existence...that's a completely different story. If you looked into my laundry closet you would probably NEVER speak to me again. I have this theory about laundry trying to take over and rule the world. You should hear it sometime. Or maybe not.

I am SO waiting for some wonderful genius woman to invent *disposable clothes. That would be the most wonderful thing EVER.

We have ALOT of laundry, as you can probably imagine. I think the baby is actually the cleanest little person in our house. How sad is that? Or maybe it's my oldest son. This boy, will take a shower and try to put on the SAME DIRTY BOXERS that he just took off! I have actually had to start doing a daily boxer check on a 9 yr old! What is UP with THAT??

My girlies ~ the self proclaimed princesses ~ they LOVE to wear pretty dresses. I don't know where this fascination came from. It's a lucky day for my husband if he comes home to find me in jeans instead of pajamas. Fear not, he is very aware how HOT pajamas are. You don't need to tell him. Truly. He knows. I love pajamas. I will seriously take a shower only to put on MORE PAJAMAS. But they insist on wearing 'princessy (YA that's a word 'cause i just made it a word) clothes and if they get even one teeeeeny tiiiiny spot on it they MUST immediatly be regarbed in proper princess wear.

My toddler *the moose, is just a MESS. He somehow manages to get dirty no matter WHAT we are doing. Every Sunday I have to explain to the girls in Tiny Tots at churchthat YES he WAS clean when we put him in the truck and NO I have no clue HOW he got so filthy in the carseat. This child here, he is the only child I know who can actually get dirty IN THE BATH TUB. So, when I can manage to keep clothes on him, they are only clean for roughly...2 minutes. Really. I'm not exaggerating. Not even a little bit.

But I digress. I'm just procrastinating so that you won't see what a terrible 'sahm' i am.
I don't have alot of time to mess with the laundry. Ok really, that's just a different way to say that I procrastinate when it comes to laundry too. I wait and wait and let it pile and pile until it literally eyeballs me from the closet, which by this time is open because the laundry is finding it's way out the door, and practically BEGGING me to just WASH IT! And finally I will. And that's when the CLEAN laundry takes over my bedroom. And Bathroom. And wherever else it will fit.

But hey, the floor is clean enough to eat off of, which is a good thing because Chloee oee oee has a particular fondness for hiding cheerios under the furniture...just in case she gets hungry later. Read the full story